act 1. scene 1.
EMPLOYEE 1:
Hey, during this tough economy, it was a great idea to hire this cheap Jack Nicholson impersonator as entertainment.
EMPLOYEE 2:
Thanks, yeah, Christian Slater is doing a great job.
THE MAN WHO ALWAYS GETS ONE LETTER WRONG THUS HIS LIFE RESEMBLES A REALLY BAD COMIC STRIP
act 1. scene 1.
MAN:
Here's that pigeon wearing lingerie you ordered.
OTHER MAN:
I said exotic bird!
TWO OBNOXIOUS PEOPLE GREET EACH OTHER
act 1. scene 1.
PERSON 1:
I miss your face!
PERSON 2:
Where have you been my whole life?!
MIKE TYSON: POST IMPRESSIONIST
act 1. scene 1.
MIKE TYSON:
Here I lie, with all this artistic talent, a tortured artist. I shouldn't have eaten Van Gogh's ear.
FRIEND WHO IS ANNOYING AFTER MIDNIGHT
act 1. scene 1.
BEN:
Ok, so I'll see you tomorrow.
RICH:
Well, technically I'll see you today.
THE TABLE & THE COASTER
act 1. scene 1.
TABLE:
My sole purpose is to put things on. Everytime you impose yourself between me and a glass you tell me I can't do my job! (pause) The scars of condensation would be far less painful than what you're putting me through.
THE CLASSICALLY TRAINED ACTOR WHO DOESN'T UNDERSTAND ACTING
act 1. scene 1.
DAISY:
Do you remember daddy's wheat fields back in Nebraska? Remember how they smell on a humid August night?
GREG:
Hang on, I'm trying to, using the technique of sense memory. Is it time for my soliloquy?
VERY FAT CANNIBAL
act.1 scene 1.
JON:
Hey, I ate that book club sandwich you told me about.
ROOMATE:
That was my book club!
3 comments:
Tres drole! Tres amusant! (Since I have no words suitable in my own language for how funny these playlets are I will resort to using French.) And...I would like to option THE TABLE & THE COASTER.
Just have to mention that I meet people on the street who tell me they have been reading your blog and laughing themselves silly. They say you are a pro, they say they expect to read you in the newspapers, they say you are brilliant.
you've done it again tom henry, you've done it again.
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